Showing posts with label Health. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Health. Show all posts

Sunday, October 21, 2012

The Other Shoe

There's this lie that has decided to worm it's way into my head, probably into yours too.

"Just wait - things are too good right now. It won't last.
Don't get too happy, because you'll lose everything sooner or later.
Better prepare yourself now for the heartache that is bound to come."

Wow, talk about a joy killer! That's exactly what it is too.
"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy"
~John 10:10

It's so odd how I can know in my mind that this hesitation, this fear that the other shoe is bound to drop at some point is a lie. But, I let it have a hold. I have chosen to let it tie me down. When really, I'd like to skip through the streets yelling, "I'm gonna have a baby girl, she's gonna be beautiful and my handsome husband and I are gonna be parents!!!!!!"

I don't want to feel guilty about being happy, or excited, but this lie tells me to stay timid and meek. That if I get too excited I might lose it all. It's funny how I think that by keeping my joy at bay I could somehow stave off pain or loss.

No, the truth is
"Jesus came so that you would have life, and have it to the full."
~John 10:10

That means today, tomorrow and Wednesday when I meet this new little life, I can drink it in fully. Living completely alive and in the moment I can weep for joy, grin from ear to ear, post annoying pictures on facebook and tell the world about this precious gift we've been given.

So goodbye fear and anxiety, I'm not having you. I choose LIFE.
And even if the other shoe drops, I have a truth to sustain me:
"The people I love are safer in God's hands than in my own."
~Shelby
Waiting for baby...

Monday, July 9, 2012

Gaining Weight

Fear.
Shame.
Gaining Weight.

Here I am, five months pregnant and excited, ready to put on those pounds for the life that kicks and flips inside of me. But, as much as I hate to admit this, it wasn't easy at first.

I told myself I would not be one of those women who hated her pregnant body. In fact, I've always thought pregnant women are the most beautiful form of a woman. Life growing inside, what could be better?

But then, I started to gain weight, and what's worse I felt nauseous at every turn. So instead of the blissful glow everyone talks about, I felt sick. I didn't want food, and that terrified me. It reminded me too much of the time I had spent starving myself.  And the fear, that nagging fear of being fat, ugly or unwanted pestered me. I lost four pounds in the first trimester. While often normal, it scared me considering my past.

Truth: Your body, your baby needs nourishment.
Truth: It's ok to eat when you're hungry, especially now. Listen to your body and respond with healthy choices.
Lie: You'll never be desirable again.
Lie: You don't really need to eat more, you can just stay the same weight throughout this pregnancy.

Ha, those lies are ridiculous. I can see how the enemy and this world are working to destroy my precious little girl before she is even born. And the nerve, he's using the old lies in MY PAST to accomplish our dual destruction.

But I write this today as a reminder and as a declaration of victory. Enough of that! Bring on the food! I love this new little life, and whatever I need to gain, however that may impact my body, it is all worth it.

For this child, and for me. Life is still worth fighting for, especially now.
~Shelby
Baby girl at 20 weeks, and yes sucking her thumb!
Truth: I have loved you with an everlasting love...I will build you up again. ~Jeremiah 31:3 & 4

Sunday, March 11, 2012

The Story

In a nutshell, this video introduces you to me. It's not all about what went wrong, but what God did out of the darkness.


Episode 84: Recovered with Shelby Lynn from mitchkrusetv on Vimeo.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Healing

"...for I am the LORD, who heals you..."
Exodus 15:26 NIV

When I was at Grace College the campus counselor was a gift. She confronted me, allowed me to cry, and neither pitied nor bullied me. At at time when I hated myself and felt unlovable, she helped me experience self-hatred so that I could also experience the Grace of God. But of all the truth I learned in that little office, I hang my hat on this the most...

"With God there can be complete healing..."


So a little science here. According to the Cleveland Clinic, upwards of 20% of people with anorexia die, and anywhere from 24-56% of those with diagnosed anorexia never fully recover.* My mom read those stats at one point and had a major freak out moment, who wouldn't? Sometimes I'm scared to have a daughter because of threats like that. And yet,

etsy.com/listing/79020020/my-love-is-the-sea-necklace
"With God there can be complete healing..."


The temptation is still there - when I'm extremely overwhelmed or emotionally distraught.  The option to fall back is there.  And sometimes the lies have a way of slithering back in. But, we serve a perfect God who is greater than any illness, whether it's one we can see like cancer - or can't, like depression. I believe God can fully and completely heal, and I do not need to live in fear that healing and wholeness is impossible.

"With God there can be complete healing for your marriage"
"With God there can be complete healing for your broken heart"
"With God there can be complete healing between you and your father"
"With God there can be complete healing with the church"
"With God there can be complete healing from..."
~ Shelby


"But for you that honor my name, victory will shine like the sun with healing in its rays..."
Malachi 4:2 CEV
*Franco, Kathleen N. (2011). Eating Disorders. Cleveland Clinic. Retrieved January 25, 2012, from http://www.clevelandclinicmeded.com/medicalpubs/diseasemanagement/psychiatry-psychology/eating-disorders/

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Food Control

Lies intermixed with truth. Because fruits, vegetables, natural and organic foods are healthy. But extreme control, fear of fat and an empty plate are stark realities that I face when I'm weak. It's when I'm tired, emotional or feeling pain that I run to the comfort of control. Knowing that so much is out of my control, food becomes the way I cope. 

And the lies wash over me like a seducer promising a beautiful night of passion. The words are comforting, but they only lead to pain and destruction.

I am so ashamed of being human. To mess up, make mistakes, have a muffin top and admit that I don't have it all figured out. One day I won't be ashamed. When my body really is perfect, my mind will be too.  I'll realize that the entire goal was to have a body that reflected and exalted Him. Not in appearance, but in its person. 
~ Shelby

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Feet

I'm not a big fan of feet, they're ugly. But my own feet I can tolerate. It might have something to do with the fact that my feet inspire me, these two have survived a lot, all 10 toes in fact, deserve an award.

I nearly lost one of them when I was a sophomore in college. Two days after my man proposed, I wound up in the hospital with a strange circulation problem that turned the little piggy black & blue.  After a week on blood thinners and the same meds my grandparents take, I was sent back to the cold world with my toes wrapped warmly in socks and shoes.  But I viewed my feet differently after that.

They are something that I protect, I watch carefully, and on a good day, I let them out to wiggle free in the sunshine.  My feet remind me that I'm weak, that if I forget to protect them they could be in danger again. That while doctors and medicines are strong, sometimes there isn't an explanation for healing, it just happens, slowly over time and usually the Healer goes unnoticed. My feet help me remember Him.
~Shelby

My feet in the ocean off the coast of Australia.